


Brutal Sameness

by novelistjugheadjones



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017), Riverdale - Fandom
Genre: Angst, F/M, angsty, break-up fic, reunited relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-05
Updated: 2017-07-05
Packaged: 2018-11-23 14:46:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11404632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novelistjugheadjones/pseuds/novelistjugheadjones
Summary: Request; Reggie “And now my life doesn’t make sense anymore. I almost wish I hadn’t met him. How am I supposed to go back to my old life, my days stretching out before me with unending and brutal sameness? How am I supposed to go back to being The Girl Who Reads? Not that I begrudge my life in books.”





	Brutal Sameness

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: So, I do this hella embarrassing thing when I’m tired where I will literally mix up the spelling of words. Like, ‘They’re, There, and Their.’ and it’s so cringe worthy so please let me know if I did this anywhere in here!   
> As always feedback is greatly appreciated and I hope y’all enjoy!

You had been looking for a reason to break up with him for awhile now. The big question was why, and you wished you knew the answer. But it came as no surprise when the urgent need to break his heart struck you randomly five months after you had began dating.   
It always happened like this. With all the past people you had dated, you always felt the urge to break up with them almost exactly five months after you had your first kiss.   
You were scared. Scared of what, exactly? That was another good question that you wished you had the answer to.   
You were on your way to Reggie’s house right now, and you couldn’t wait to just get it over with. You needed space, that was all. That was what you were going to tell him. And it wasn’t a lie.   
When you pulled into his driveway, you stayed in the car. The car continued running and the music you had been quietly playing on your way here was still going. It wouldn’t stop.   
Your grip tightened on the steering wheel before you forced yourself to look back up at his house. He was already walking towards you with a happy but confused look on his face.   
With the sight of him, you finally turned your car off and got out, meeting him halfway. When you automatically reached up to hug him he caught you of guard, picking you up and swinging you around once.   
You could’ve broke down right there.   
But you didn’t. Instead, you forced a smile before speaking. “I need to tell you something.”   
His smile immediately fell. “Yeah, okay…is everything alright?”   
You began nodding but halfway through decided against it and shook your head. “Reggie, I need some space.” You blurted it out. It sounded so harsh that it almost shocked you.   
You could almost pinpoint the exact moment that his heart shattered. You could almost hear the sound of it stopping. “What, why? I thought things were going great.”   
You smiled again, trying to touch his shoulder but he slowly pulled away from you. “It is. It was. I just…Reggie-” Your smile only widened, to show just how much more fake it was. “I need some time. To figure things out.”   
He slowly began nodding. “No, I understand.” His voice was barely a whisper.   
“I’m sorry.” You were.   
“Me too.” Of what?   
Before you could say anything else, he turned around and walked back into his house. Leaving you in the middle of his driveway, not knowing exactly what to do with yourself.   
This feeling was new. Usually you felt better afterwards. But instead you just felt empty, like a piece of you was already missing. 

~~  
“Veronica, why do I do things like this? Why do I feel like I have to break up with people?” You were driving yourself insane when you got home and decided to give your best friend, V, a call.   
“Y/N, what you’re doing is totally normal and you’re not the only girl who does this. I wouldn’t stress it.”   
“I think I love him.” You mumbled, covering your mouth to try and stop yourself from crying.   
“Then why did you break up with him?” Suddenly Veronica was finally catching on to how confusing this whole situation was.   
“I wish I knew. It’s like…there’s this alarm that goes off in my mind after I’ve been with people for awhile and it tells me ‘Quick! Before it’s too late!’“   
“Too late for what?”   
“Before it’s too late and I fall in love with them. I dunno…maybe it was the way I grew up. Watching relationships come together and fall apart in my life wasn’t the most pleasing thing to watch.”   
The other line fell silent, and you could hear V talking to someone else in the background before she finally came back. “I asked my mom and she said I could stay the night with you tonight. Are your parents still out of town?” 

~~

It had been two weeks since you had broken up with Mantle the magnificent and nothing had felt better yet.   
Everything felt so empty.   
Even walking around in your favorite bookstore couldn’t cheer you up. After you had been walking around in the bookstore for five minutes your mind automatically drifted to all the times Reggie reluctantly agreed to coming here with you and watching you almost contently as you picked out a few books. You could spend an hour or more in there and he wouldn’t have cared one bit.   
You rushed out of the bookstore as quickly as possible at the thought of it. 

~~

The project had sounded very simple when the teacher had explained it. But now as you sat in your room, trying to come up with a short poem and/or quote to explain how you were feeling, you couldn’t.   
About two hours later, an idea finally struck you and you began writing. 

~~

It was your turn to get up and read your quote in front of the whole class a few days later, and you tried looking everywhere but at Reggie who happened to share this class with you.   
Clearing your throat, you pulled the little sheet of paper you had wrote it on and began to read it aloud.   
"And now my life doesn’t make sense anymore.” Your eyes found Reggie’s now as you continued reading, “I almost wish I hadn’t met him. How am I supposed to go back to my old life, my days stretching out before me with unending and brutal sameness? How am I supposed to go back to being The Girl Who Reads? Not that I begrudge my life in books.“ You read it very slowly to make it sound longer than it was, but never once let your eyes wander from Reg’s.   
By the time you were done reading, you were practically on the verge of sobbing and quickly stopped and sat back down. 

Reggie stopped you in the hallway after class, “Can we talk?”   
You wanted to say no. Just get it done an over with, finish everything right here and now. “Sure.” You replied instead.   
He pulled you into the music room after checking that the coast was clear and you closed the door behind you.   
“What’s up?” You tried to sound a lot more confident than you felt, but your voice cracked somewhere along the lines.   
He sighed, looking anywhere but at you, “I miss you.”  
You wanted to tell him that you missed him, too. “Okay.”   
He continued, barely noticing you said anything at all, “And I want to know what I did wrong.”   
Your eyes watered up at that and you quickly shook your head. “Reggie, no. You didn’t do anything wrong. You were…are so perfect.”   
“Then why? I think after what you’ve put me through these past two weeks that I deserve a little bit of an explanation.”   
“You do. Can we maybe sit down?”   
He sighed and you walked over to a row of seats in the corner and sat down, expecting him to sit, too. But he just stood, looking like he wanted to begin pacing but didn’t.   
“I broke up with you because that’s what I always do. I break up with people so much it’s became an ugly habit of mine.” You began, pausing to see what his reaction was to the first part of your explanation.   
“Why?” He just seemed more confused than he had when he brought you in here. You couldn’t blame him.   
“Because…I’ve never really seen the point in falling in love. Yes, I’ve fallen in like quite a few times. But it’s what comes after that completely terrifies me. It’s like…when I know I’m about to fall in love I go into a safe mode where I just shut down. I don’t want anything to do with those emotions. So, I break it off before it has the chance to become more. But see, here’s my problem with you; I was too late.” You stood up, and took a step closer to him. “I was too late because I am already so terrifyingly in love with you. And I miss you, too.” You paused, and when he didn’t say anything, you continued. You felt so amazing being able to tell him this. “When I was in the bookstore the other day, I broke down. Which isn’t something that I pride myself on doing. But I did. I broke down right after I completely ran out of there. Because I knew something was missing. I missed those little smiles you’d always give me when I’d find a new book and I missed you being able to reach the higher shelves to get a book for me. It was the first time that I truly came to terms with the fact that I was missing something that had became such a big part in my life already.”   
He still didn’t say anything.   
Suddenly it dawned on you, it was too late.   
Before you could make an exit, though, Reggie’s lips found yours. You smiled against his lips before deepening the kiss, running a hand through his hair. You missed this, too.   
When you two finally pulled away, the biggest smiles you’d ever seen were across your faces. “I love you, Y/N Y/L/N.”   
“I love you too, Mantle.”


End file.
